Anxiety about time

I’m not sure when this started, maybe when I was in elementary or middle school, but I seem to recall being petrified of being late. Or missing the bus. As I’ve grown, the thought of being late to things, work especially, has taken ahold of my alarm system in my head and on my phone.Continue reading “Anxiety about time”

A Mental Assessment

I’ve posted before that I’ve been using BetterHelp for therapy and I talked with my therapist about taking medication. I’ve done this before but I went to a general practitioner for this. So, the medication I took was not very on point. I took Escitalopram and Lexapro which are basically the same thing. My therapistContinue reading “A Mental Assessment”

Day 1 with BetterHelp

I’ve officially signed up with a counselor to take a whack at my problems. According to her bio, she focuses on both the physical and mental health of her patients. (Is that what I’d be called?) I’ve already sent her this incredibly long and slightly detailed message of my daily life and what issues IContinue reading “Day 1 with BetterHelp”

1-16-20

So, can pills really change a person’s entire thought process? I know they can change your mood because I used to take anti-depressants (Lexapro and Escitalopram- which are pretty much the same thing). I would usually get to the point where I either felt one of two things: nothing or everything. The thing is, I’m desperate to shakeContinue reading “1-16-20”

Finally starting to feel up

I know I usually post a lot when I’m down but I was just too down last week. My birthday was just me choosing to be alone so I could nurse my mental wounds with Seagrams and Marlboros. I did get some money from my parents which turned into groceries. I finally felt like I’dContinue reading “Finally starting to feel up”

Something I wrote on 8/15/19

Dodie has me thinking, today. I’ve had to catch myself in conversation with Monroe because I’m not paying her 100% of my attention. Bad me! Let me explain. In Dodie’s book “Secrets for the Mad…”, she describes how little she feels during her outings with her friends and how it affected how she absorbed theContinue reading “Something I wrote on 8/15/19”